The holidays can be stressful, overwhelming, and a time for unhappiness to creep in. The time change has it getting dark before 5 p.m. The temperature is lower causing you to want to stay home in sweats under a warm blanket, or at least I do. This time of year is my least favorite because I go to work in the dark and come home in the dark, but I remind myself it too shall pass. Believe me when I tell you that although I don’t love the weather, I love the holidays! I love the festivities, decorations, the baking, the time with family, and rest!

You’re probably thinking, rest, who has time for rest in December? I do. Halfway through November I start to wind down. Photography slows down with the weather and time change just making it too challenging. I do some behind the scenes back office stuff but mostly I enjoy my evenings watching Christmas movies with weekends spent taking naps. However, this hasn’t always been the case. Yes, was my answer to everything and I filled our calendar to the brim to the point of unhappiness. I quickly learned that that was not the reason for the season and I didn’t want to live a life like that. We couldn’t do it all.

I hate the stress and pressure the holidays bring for most. It shouldn’t be filled with stress of buying the perfect gift or running from house to house ensuring you have a hostess gift. The dinners and parties are about the people and not how perfect everything is. It should be about how you spend your holiday and who you spend it with. We have used the 5 tips below and have found our holiday season much happier and today I am sharing them with you.

1. Plan

We found Thanksgiving and Christmas to be challenging with two sets of families when we got married. We want to see everyone but obviously couldn’t be at dinner at the same time at two different houses. TJ and I each communicated our wants and invites and came up with a plan for both holidays to be fair to both families. We now have Thanksgiving breakfast at our house with my side of the family and dinner at his parents house with his side of the family. We handle Christmas similarly. Christmas Eve is Christmas in Germany so we celebrate at my parents house for their annual holiday party. We stay home, make breakfast, and have our own Christmas on Christmas morning. We then go to my parents for a quick stop around lunch to exchange gifts and end the evening at his parents house for dinner. This plan has really worked for us over the years.

2. Limit the Number of Holiday Parties

Everyone throws a holiday party; your work, your family, and your friends. All of these parties are great to catch up with friends and have fun. But, you can’t make them all and keep your sanity. If you know of annual parties you both enjoy than put those on the calendar. Say no to the ones you think will be more of a burden than fun. Don’t book more than one party a day because the stress to run from one to the other isn’t worth it. You could alternate holiday parties each year for the annual ones so you are still attending, just not annually. We have 2-3 parties we attend and that’s it. They are spaced out on the calendar and we decline others to avoid flooding our calendar and sanity.

3. Communicate Plans

After you decide on which parties and events you will be attending, it is best to share that information with your friends and family. By telling them in advance you are informing them and setting their expectations. There is no miscommunication or hurt feelings because you are being up front and honest. Our family knows our holiday schedule and when they can expect us. Our holiday plans have never been an issue since.

4. Keeping Your Routine

Although it can be very challenging to keep your normal routine, it is very important. I know that my gym routine is a huge part of my overall happiness, because when I don’t go I am grumpy and down on myself. So I know that I need to keep my gym routine. It may not be 6 days a week but knowing I can get in at least 4-5 days is enough for me. The same goes for our meal prepping, if we have healthy meal options throughout the week we will be less likely to make a rash decision to eat out. We will know that we are still fueling our bodies with good low cost meals. We also know that desserts are huge this time of year and have found low carb recipes to still indulge a bit. It is all about keeping your routine and finding alternatives to make good decisions.

5. Don’t go into debt buying gifts:

The holidays aren’t about the perfect present but about being present in the holiday. Ever since TJ and I took the Financial Peace University we have been more aware of our financial situation. We have actively saved throughout the year to fund our guilt free Christmas shopping. We have a limit and know that we can buy anything for those on our list within that limit.

The holidays can be a season of happiness and love if you use the 5 tips above to set you and your family up for success. We have used these tips for the last 5 years of our marriage.

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